Beer Update

The Belgian Tripel that I have in the fermenter right now is going beautifully so far--not bragging or anything.  The temperature is holding at a steady 68°F which is like Disneyland for yeast.  The airlock has been steadily bubbling for the last week or so and it's been very encouraging.  So encouraging, in fact, that I've decided to bang out another five gallon batch of brew right on the heels of the Tripel.

Heather took a bread making class at Brooklyn Kitchen--an establishment at which Heather and I have taken a handful of classes, some of them beer related--and she suggested that if I were to brew another beer, I could use her 10% class discount to buy ingredients.  I said let's do it.  It wasn't until that very night that I decided on the beer to brew.  I decided on a coffee stout.

My "stout"

As loyal readers may recall, I tried my hand at a stout earlier in the year.  The result was a drinkable beer, but very pale.  I had a couple of theories about what went wrong with the color--maybe I didn't steep the grains for long enough or maybe I didn't get the right kind of malt.  A lot of things could have happened.  That beer marked the first time that I selected the ingredients myself rather than have the home brew shop assemble them for me.  I got the recipe from the Keystone Homebrew website--a great resource for extract brewing recipes--but I got the ingredients from Brooklyn Kitchen.  As a result, I had to make substitutions for some ingredients that they didn't carry.

It didn't occur to me until two nights ago--after I picked up the ingredients for this upcoming batch--that the grains need to be milled or crushed.  Every time I get my ingredients from Keystone, they prep the grains and blend them together.  Part of that preparation includes milling the grains so that the hot water can get access to the starch inside the grain and turn it into fermentable sugar.  Brooklyn Kitchen will not automatically do that for you, which explains the pale color and the low Original Gravity (1.040 as opposed to the 1.050 that the recipe estimated).  I felt (feel) like an idiot, but I am happy that it's no longer a mystery.  The code is cracked and I'm excited to move forward.

As luck would have it, Heather left her phone at Brooklyn Kitchen after her class.  She called them the next day and had them set it aside to be picked up later.  The phone retrieval gave me an excuse to go back, hat in hand, and ask them to let me mill my grains.  They were happy to oblige.

Whenever I get the kits from Keystone Homebrew, they give me the Wyeast smack packs of yeast that inflate when you burst the little bag inside.  When I go to Brooklyn Kitchen and pick out my own stuff, I get the White Labs vial of Irish Ale Yeast.  There's really not a great deal of difference between the two, but the vial makes me feel like more of a scientist.  The smack pack--while effective--makes me feel like I'm about to treat a sports injury.  Hopefully with my properly cracked grain, I'll be able to give the yeast a little more fermentable sugar to feed on.

I am very excited to return to beer brewing after this long hot summer.  I spent a good chunk of yesterday cleaning used bottles with my bottle brush and removing their labels with steel wool, which works leaps and bounds better than the scouring side of our dish sponge.  Heather is slowly getting used to the amassing of bottles in the apartment and has been putting up with it like a saint.

Bottling day for the Tripel is a week from today and I'll be able to drink it two weeks after that.  The recipe suggests that the beer could benefit from a secondary fermentation in a glass carboy.  Unfortunately, I don't own a glass carboy so I'll be skipping that step.  As far as I've come with beer brewing, there is still so far to go.  I suppose that's one of the things that keeps me interested; there's always going to be more complex and elaborate things you can do to make your beer better.

Tripel Preview

Now that the temperature has gone down quite a bit, it looks as if I'm ready to start brewing again.  I did some research into which style I should pursue next; porter is something I've wanted to try for a while but it might be a little to similar to my nut brown ale.  I thought I should do something interesting, new and challenging.  It is in that spirit that I went with a Belgian-style ale.

Belgian ales have a very sharp, distinct taste to them and the yeast plays a very important role in the flavor. The home brew shop had recipes for four different types of Belgian ale--Dubbel, White, Saison and Tripel.  I decided to go with the Tripel.  The decision was made somewhat arbitrarily.  This particular style has one of the highest alcohol contents which wasn't the reason I picked it, but I wanted to try to make something that packs a wallop.  The beers I've made up until now have been fairly mild and smooth.  It might be a nice change of pace to make something that puts hair on my chest.  

A couple of commercial brands of Belgian style beer that I enjoy are Duvel and Chimay.  Both have a very strong, heavy flavor to them.  They are beers that are better savored slowly than consumed quickly. They tend to be very flowery and aromatic as opposed to something like a german lager or pilsner which is very clean and crisp.

Tripels tend to be a little bit stronger and a little bit paler that most Belgian beers.  When I went into the home brew shop and said I wanted to brew a tripel, the guy gave me a high gravity trappist yeast that he said was pretty high octane stuff.  The yeast needs to be really resilient to withstand the alcohol it gives off which, in this case, will be somewhere around 8%-9%.  The most important thing is that the final product tastes good.  I will be taking copious notes on the entire endeavor that I will share here as I move forward.  Wish me luck.

Dominating the Airwaves

As many of you may know from the previous post, I was featured on WDEL's lovely Thirsty Thursday segment of The Rick Jensen Show.  Gina, a good friend from college, has made herself a staple at WDEL 1150 in Wilmington, DE.  About a month and a half ago, she visited our apartment and tried some of my nut brown ale, probably my best beer to date.

I was buzzed into the studio and met up with Gene, Gina's fiance, who also works at the station.  We hung out at his desk and chatted for a while as Gina finished up an interview.  I told him that there was an irrational part of my brain that thought I had to use hushed tones in a radio station.  Like there were microphones everywhere or something.  He told me that he understood...sort of.  

We were almost ready to go.  Rick came out and introduced himself.  As everyone was setting up, he asked me a couple of questions about where I was from, the beer I liked, stuff like that.  We all shuffled into the studio, which forms kind of a semi-circle around the sound board, and took our places at the microphones.  I got my beer out and was ready to go.

I brought the same nut brown ale that I mentioned earlier in the blog and distributed it amongst the panel, first in tiny glasses and then when those ran out, styrofoam cups.  I'll spare you the details of the show itself and encourage you to listen to the program.  Rick was a real pro, by the way.  He came off like a guy who feels at home in this kind of setting.  The commercial breaks had the same tone as the rest of the show--the panel informally chatting about this and that.  (Rick Jensen likes my chucks, by the way.)  In the end, my beer got a rating of 5 out of 6 and I got a little round of applause for my trouble.  You can't beat that.  After the show I packed up my stuff and had to clear out pretty quickly to make room for the next show--a news program of some sort.

When we were done, I was a nerd and asked for a picture with everyone there.  I'm just happy that everyone accepted and joined in on my nerd-dom.  Gina would be in it but she's the one taking it.

The show was helpful in focusing my attention on brewing again.  I've been unable to because my apartment reaches kiln-like temperatures during the summer months, but considering that yesterday was practically jacket weather, I think all systems are go.  This coming weekend, I plan to make a stop at the homebrew shop to weigh my options--perhaps something I haven't tried before.

New frontiers are in view.  A couple weeks ago, I took a class on all-grain brewing at the Brooklyn Kitchen that got me pretty excited.  I like the idea of using as few processed ingredients as possible and making beer from scratch...or at least as from scratch as I can reasonably get.  It's going to take some new equipment though, and new equipment is going to mean a monetary investment.  Someday though. For now though, extract brewing will have to do.  I know Heather is excited that the apartment will not be completely overrun with a ten gallon stockpot and a cooler that's been converted into a mash/lauter tun...yet.

On the Air

Will spent Thursday traveling to visit our friend Gina who works at WDEL 1150AM in Delaware. He appeared on the Rick Jenson segment "Thirsty Thursday" to talk about home brewing and the assembled group sampled his Nut Brown Ale. Rick scored it a 5 out of 6 and refereed to it as "Mapley". Listen to the full segment. (Quick tip, the beer stuff doesn't start until about 6 min 30 seconds in)

Witte Screwdriver

I'm not usually one to incorporate beer into my cocktails, but sometimes the occasion calls for it.  One of the newer bars that we've been frequenting is called Sweet Afton.  It has a good atmosphere, knowledgable staff and these deep fried spicy pickles that are to die for.

Anyway, Heather and I learned that they serve brunch on the weekends and some of the items looked intriguing.  We get there and Heather orders the blueberry pancakes, which she ended up loving and pining after ever since.  I got a burger, which really isn't fantastic brunch fare, but I was happy.  The happy hour cocktail menu has plenty of fun brunch cocktails to try, ranging from your standard bloody mary to something called an oatmeal martini.  One of the best parts is that the cocktails are no more than six dollars a piece.

I see on their menu of brunch cocktails that they have something called a Witte Screwdriver.  A screwdriver, as I understand it, incorporates vodka and orange juice.  This concoction goes a step further and replaces the vodka with Citron and adds lemon, ginger and beer to the mix.

The beer they use is Ommegang Witte.  For those of you unfamiliar with it, it's a belgian-style wheat beer that is very light in color.  The yeast is prominent in the flavor and it has mild notes of citrus.  The cocktail they serve me is delicious.  Looking at the ingredients, I felt that I could play around with the proportions and recreate this pleasant cocktail.  A 25 oz. bottle ran me about $6.99 at the local grocery store which seems kind of pricey especially considering that the original cocktail only ran me five bucks, but I did get the tactile pleasure of popping a cork and having it fly across the room.  It makes me feel like I've accomplished something.

Witte Screwdriver

adapted from Sweet Afton

-2 oz. Absolut Citron

-1/2 oz ginger syrup

-2 oz. orange juice

-juice of half a lemon

-Ommegang Witte

Pour Citron, ginger syrup, orange juice, and lemon juice over ice in a pint glass or other tall glass.  Fill with Witte and gently stir.

One of the goals I have in life (outside of memorizing Hall and Oates' entire catalogue and learning scrimshaw) is having a cocktail recipe at the ready for whatever situation I may be in--morning and early afternoon included.  I admire this cocktail for its deft combination of flavors.  The beer itself is a very prominent flavor, which is good because it's a premium beer.  The other ingredients serve to enhance the flavor by complementing the citrus, and the ginger is the unexpected twist.

Perhaps this has shifted my entire worldview on beer as a mixer.  Sure it's great by itself--no one's denying that.  But perhaps it can exist in piece and harmony with liquor and juice.  Perhaps it's not the lone wolf I thought it was.  If beer can learn to play nice, then perhaps there's hope for all of us.

Beer Season Finale-Nut Brown Ale

The third batch of beer has been completed. It's a Nut Brown Ale and it's coming right off the heels of the "Stout" I made for round two. I put the word Stout in quotes because when you look at it, the first thought that comes to mind is not Stout. It's very good, but it's very pale.

I might have guessed that it would be that way from the very beginning. It looked a little pale from the onset even after all the ingredients were added. In the back of my head, I thought, "Well maybe it will darken over time." Now I know for the future that it won't--at least not in any substantial way. I have two theories about what happened; it could be either or both. The recipe I used called for two cans of light malt extract. It struck me as funny that one would use light malt extract for one of the darkest styles of beer.

Second, (and brace yourself for nerd talk) the darkness of the barley malt is measured in degrees lovibond or ˚L. The recipe I was using called for a rating of 675˚L and the darkest I could find was 413˚L-450˚L. As I've mentioned in a previous blog, we went to the Brooklyn Kitchen to pick up all of the ingredients. They didn't have exactly what the recipe called for so I had to settle for a lesser lovibond. What's the big deal right?

Now I know the significance. The Nut Brown Ale turned out a lot darker than the Stout and I think it has a lot to do with the type of malt extract used (Amber as opposed to Light) and the grains used (338˚L was the darkest grain used, but there was more grain used overall.)

So the Stout didn't turn out exactly as I planned. But you know what? It's still really good and I learned a lot from that batch of beer. It was my first attempt at making a yeast starter and it was a rousing success. For those new to brewing, a starter gives the yeast a fighting chance by letting it reproduce by itself before pitching it into the wort. It was difficult to tell if the starter had the proper amount of activity inside. I only sealed the top with a piece of plastic wrap fastened loosely with a rubber band--the MacGyver approach to staving off bacteria. For a good chunk of time, I didn't know if it was working. This time around, for the Nut Brown Ale, I picked up a rubber stopper that I can attach my airlock to so I can actually watch the air escape bubble by bubble. Less than a dollar is a small price to pay for piece of mind.

I've learned that priming the beer with sugar before bottling is easier than priming with malt extract and produces a thicker head and more carbonation. I will still continue to toy with different priming sugars to see the different qualities of each. People use corn sugar, honey and even maple syrup. The possibilities are endless and delicious.

But I could not be more pleased with the latest beer. It's fairly dark, almost to the point of looking like a porter, and it's got a bit of bite to it. It's nice and warm and roasted and goes down smooth. I like it a bit more than the last one. Take a look at the picture on the left and guess which is the Stout and which is the Nut Brown Ale. You'd be wrong. I'm still getting the swing of things.

I'm really enjoying this whole beer brewing process and look forward to brewing more and blogging about it in the future, but unfortunately I'll have to hang it up for the season. Brewing requires consistent temperatures of about 65˚F-70˚F and our apartment just gets too hot. As you've read in my posts before, I was tempting fate as it was by keeping the fermenter in the bathroom with the window open to keep it cool. I was entertaining the idea of emptying out the fridge, putting the fermenter in there and just eating take-out every night, but Heather nixed that idea pretty quickly. Women--am I right fellas? Always letting sanity get in the way of good beer.

Anotheroom

In celebration of Heather's birthday, I took her out for a trendy date night. The main event of the evening was a restaurant called Locanda Verde in Tribeca. Last year, she clipped a review out of Time Out: New York and put it on my pillow. This was soon before the wedding and put on the back burner for a while. Once the wedding was over, back on my pillow it went. To Heather's credit, I'm not a guy who picks up on subtlety. Needless to say, it's a restaurant that Heather has wanted to try for quite some time now and apparently she is not alone. I tried to make reservations about a week and a half in advance and was unable. This is why I had to wait until this past Friday to do it. Oops. Better late than never I guess.

We almost never make it down to Tribeca, and with our reservations at 8:15, we had some time to kill. Heather, never being one to pass up an opportunity to try places in a neighborhood we're unfamiliar with, suggests we drop by a nearby establishment called Anotheroom. This is the third of three bars by the same owner, Craig Weiss, the others being The Room and The Otheroom. There are also locations in Florida and California called The Room and The Otheroom. I thought it would have been funnier to keep giving them different names to distinguish them like Yet Anotheroom or Anotheroom Still. Craig, if you're reading this, you can have those names for free.

One of the things I like when I walk into a bar is actual places to sit at said bar. Stools and such. It helps when you get to a place early enough. We were lucky to have seating because it's not a big place. There are only about eight stools total. They also have seating and small tables around the perimeter of the place. It's got kind of a dark and intimate feel to it with candles on the tables and bar. A beer is more attractive when it's backlit. Try it sometime.

When Heather told me about the place, I got it in my head that it was a wine bar. I'm not sure why; she may not have said it. But when we got there, I noticed it had quite a beer list. I get excited about big beer lists. In fact, it was bigger than the wine list. I asked Heather if she would feel left out if I had a beer instead of a glass of wine. She then told me that I was a grown man who can make his own decisions. Heather is nothing if not empowering.

I decided to go with a pint of Indian Brown Ale from Dogfish Head brewery. I've posted about Dogfish Head in the past and am fairly familiar with a few of their beers. I don't know how I missed this beer because it was delicious. It was dark, thick and almost a little smoky with a hint of coffee. It was so good, I had another one. Heather started out the evening with a malbec. It was good and everything you would want and expect from a malbec, but not a very generous pour. For her second round, Heather went with Blackthorn's Cider. It was okay, but we both agreed that it was a little watered down.

One thing to note about this establishment is that the restroom had a peculiar sliding door. It was kind of like going to the bathroom inside a storage elevator or a minivan. Who doesn't want to do that? I like Anotheroom and will probably go back. We would have stayed for a third round, but as you know, we had reservations. And I didn't want that listing on my pillow again...

Keep it Short and Stout

Note from the Editor: Due to schedule conflicts this spring, Will and I are switching days. This means you can get your weekly dose of beer and cocktail anecdotes on Monday, and your food stories and recipes on Wednesday. We hope this doesn't mess up your chi too badly.

Thanks!

Epicurette

As I was brewing my first beer, I knew that the next batch would be a stout. Heather, when giving me my beer brewing kit as a gift, was nice enough to include the ingredients for an IPA because she knew I really enjoyed that particular style. I wanted to return the favor and try my hand at a style that she enjoys.

Heather is not the biggest beer drinker in the world. That having been said, she certainly prefers some more than others. A general rule of thumb is--the darker, the better. She likes deep, flavorful and aromatic more than light, clean and ice cold. Guinness is one of her favorites, partly because of the taste and partly because she likes the smoothness of the nitrogen bubbles. They give a beer a distinct smoothness. Though I don't have the means to incorporate nitrogen into a beer, I can certainly look up a good recipe for a stout. I perused the internet for recipes, but wound up back at the website where I got my first one--Keystone Homebrew. I put together a shopping list and set out.

Heather was taking a soup class at the Brooklyn Kitchen two weeks ago and apparently on the day that a person takes a class, they get ten percent off of anything they buy. I'm in. We go to the store and check out the beer ingredients. On the table is a handful of xeroxed beer recipes. One of them included a sweet stout in which lactose is included. I learned during yeast class that a brewer puts lactose in his beer to make it sweet because it is too complex a sugar for the yeast to break down. Maybe one day I'll try it but the idea of a sweet beer is weird to me.

I was able to find my malt extract and comparable grains easily, but they didn't have the exact hops and yeast I was looking for. I spoke with a gentleman there by the name of Harry and he hooked me up with a different brand of yeast called White Labs Irish Ale Yeast. It comes in a glass vial rather than an expandable packet like Wyeast. I felt good about the vial. I'm sure that they are both fine methods for storing yeast but for some reason the packet seems gimmicky. The vial seems more scientific.

As for the hops, the recipe called for phoenix hops. I'm not an old hand at this sort of thing; I don't know the difference between one type of hops and another. Since they don't have phoenix, I ask what would be a good alternative. Harry whips out his iPhone and pulls up an app called "Get Hoppy." I guess what they say is true, there is an app for that. It gives the statistics for popular types of hops like flavor, acidity and substitutions. Unfortunately, phoenix is not listed in the app, so he runs to the internet and looks it up. It turns out it was bred as a replacement for challenger hops which they also didn't carry, so Harry set me up with U.S. perle hops. We'll see how it works out.

I thanked Harry and got a couple of other supplies--bottle caps, hydrometer tube, grolsch tops--checked out with my ten percent discount and headed over to Barcade to play some video games. When I got home I immediately bought the app for my iPod touch and played with it. I found out it also gives information on yeast. Ninety-nine cents is kind of a bargain.

A couple days before brew day, I decided I wanted to make a yeast starter. It gives the yeast a head start by letting the cells reproduce and shore up their numbers before the main event. I dissolved half a cup of malt extract into two cups of boiling water to make sort of a malt sugar syrup, cooled it, put it in a glass bottle (in this case a half gallon beer growler) and pitched the yeast right in. I wasn't around to see the bubbling (I do have a job,) but there was substantially more yeast settled at the bottom than I started with.

Brew day went a lot smoother this time around. The malt extract was a liquid this time around so I didn't have to wait as long for it to dissolve. There was a more substantial hot and cold break this time--which means that more of the unnecessary proteins solidified during the boiling and cooling of the wort and therefore won't end up in the finished product. And with my new hydrometer tube, I was able to measure and record the gravity of my beer. I'm curious why my kit came with a hydrometer and not a decent tube to put it in.

I also applied a thermometer to the outside of the fermenter so I can better regulate temperature. During the first couple days, when it was bubbling vigorously, I put it in the bathroom and opened the window all the way. All the activity gets the wort pretty warm. It's in my office right now so I can open the window if it's too warm and close them when it gets cool.

I'm excited to see how this one turns out. I'm a little older, a little wiser. I've got more equipment, certainly. When I started this endeavor I thought the next step would be lagering, but now I'm very curious about all-grain brewing as opposed to using malt extract. I'm told it gives a better character to a beer and offers more flexibility. But perhaps I'm getting to far ahead of myself for now. These are topics for future blogs.

The Inaugural Brew

After I bottled my beer, I set the bottles on the bookshelf to shield them from the harsh ambient light. I had two weeks to stare at the forty-three bottles of beer on my bookshelf and contemplate their contents. There's a certain element of awe involved. Soon it will be ready to unleash upon the world. Will it be good? Will it be bad? Who knows? Such is the mystery of life. It could be doing anything in those bottles and I'm powerless to stop it. Like an expectant parent, I worried about the future of my beer and dreamed about its infinite potential.

The best possible outcome would be if the beer turned out great. I could enjoy the fruits of my labor (or rather, hops of my labor) and share my bounty with all. The second best outcome would be if the beer was awful and undrinkable. The reason this scenario takes second place is that then I could bear my defeat in private. Sure I told people about my brewing project and shared my progress in cyberspace, but the beer would go down the drain and I could chalk it up to experience.

The worst case scenario in my mind--aside from the bottles exploding on my bookshelf--is that the beer is drinkable but off. There is an entire chapter in the beer brewing book I have about off-flavors called "Is My Beer Ruined?" It talks about causes for strange tastes in beer and possible remedies. Then when Heather and I took our yeast class in Brooklyn, our instructor emphasized how temperamental beer is as it's fermenting. I got nervous like an expectant mother. To calm myself down, I just kept telling myself, "As long as my beer has ten fingers and ten toes, I'll be happy."

But no one wants to make excuses for their beer. I didn't want to apologize as I handed out bottles. "Look, this won't be enjoyable but try to get through it." Also, I don't like being lied to. I would be forcing people to either bad mouth my creation or lie to me and say they liked it. I think if my beer were drinkable but not very good, I would be forced to drink it all myself.

I brought a six-pack to Pennsylvania for a weekend to unveil it. Heather and I snuck a taste with her mother just to make sure that it was indeed beer and not a stale mess of wort. I pulled the bottle from the fridge and slowly eased off the cap. As soon as I heard the pssst noise, my heart leapt. "That's what real beers do!" I thought. I poured the bottle into a glass, being very careful not to disturb the layer of yeast at the bottom. I took a taste and got very excited. Not only was it beer, it was decent beer. Nice and hoppy, just the way daddy likes.

I took it over to my parents' house and set up a little taste test. I let everyone try a little of my IPA and a little Dogfish Head 90 Minute IPA. My mom actually said she preferred my beer to the Dogfish Head. Score one for me: My mom thinks I'm cool. Not only is it exciting to have accomplished something like this, it's exciting to have dozens of bottles of drinkable beer. Heather thought it would be a good idea to have a beer party as a way to share this beer with the world. I thought it was a great idea. She also thought that it would be a good idea to have it coincide with her birthday party. The small gathering seemed to enjoy the brew. It wasn't all about Heather's cake.

As my first beer brewing experience draws to a close, I want to say that I think it has been a rewarding experience. I like the investment of labor and patience involved. I like the seemingly magical process of sugar turning into alcohol and carbon dioxide. And I like the social aspect of beer creation--being able to share the benefits of my crazy science experiment. I already have my next exciting new batch in the bucket and I'm very optimistic. I look forward to continuing this hobby, fine-tuning it and sharing it with you on the blog.

Bottling Brews

The long weeks of buying beer, drinking it, and amassing bottles has finally paid off. It's bottling day, people. As Heather and I were mapping this whole brewing thing out, she said that she didn't want anything to do with the first part of the process--the boiling, the extract dissolving, the wort chilling and the yeast pitching. I think in her head, I was going to destroy her entire kitchen and the apartment would reek of barley and hops for the remainder of our lease. Those things did not happen because I am a careful man and a wonderful husband.

Heather did agree to be present for the second major step of the process--bottling. The conceit of bottling is pretty simple: add sugar, put in bottles. The kit that Heather got me even came with a bag of superfine priming sugar so I didn't even have to measure it. I just had to dissolve it in two cups of boiling water and let it cool to room temperature. The biggest pains in my ass were, A) cleaning and de-labeling the bottles (I could have kept them on but I didn't want my beer to share a spotlight with Sam Adams and Magic Hat) and B) sterilizing everything and maintaining a clean work environment. These steps were taken before Heather got home from work. I only needed her there for the main event. I lined up my bottles, I set up my bucket, I re-lined up my bottles; I was so ready for this. Now if Heather would just hurry the hell up. Stupid employment.

Finally she arrived. We set to work. First thing's first, we take the lid off the fermenter for the first time in two weeks. I learned in yeast class that I should have been taking hydrometer readings every now and again, but I found that out a week and a half too late. God damn it. Maybe next time. We got the lid off and there was a thick layer of yeasty gunk on the inside wall of the fermenter. I take that as a sign that the process worked. After the yeast is pitched into the wort, there is a one to two day lag phase and then the yeast bubbles vigorously leaving behind a bunch of crap. Heather had a different reaction: "eeeeeeeewwwwwwww"

I added the sugar solution to the bottling bucket and then syphoned the beer from the fermenter to to mix it with the sugar, leaving behind the bottom layer of yeast sediment that has built up. An important thing to be aware of is that the beer should be exposed to as little oxygen as possible. Stirring the sugar in is not necessary; the swirling from the hose is enough to mix it in. I then attached the hose to the spigot on the bottling bucket. The hose comes with a neat little attachment that regulates the flow of liquid, making sure it doesn't spray or splash.

This is where Heather came in. One person could do this, but I wanted her around to speed this process up. In my mind, the longer it takes, the higher the risk for contaminants. I put the bottling bucket on the counter and got on the floor to take advantage of gravity--a dignified position. Her job was to bring me empty bottles, take them away once they were full, and cap them. It kept me from having to move. She had a little trouble with some of the caps, but discovered that she could get more leverage if she also moved to the floor. So there we were, two fully grown adults on the floor of our tiny kitchen surrounded with beer. I'm sure that image give you a lot of insight into our lives.

Aside from a couple of minor drips and bottle overflows, the bottling was a success. We ended up with a grand total of 43 twelve ounce bottles and a champagne bottle I had fitted with a grolsch bottle top. We put them all in cardboard six-pack caddies which are currently sitting on the bottom shelf of our book case while they undergo their secondary fermentation. The shelf has sliding doors so the bottles can be shielded from light. Two weeks from the bottling date, they should be ready to drink. You can be sure I'll let you know how it goes.

Those Magical Micro-organisms

As part of our ongoing quest to gain more knowledge about the world around us (funny how the world around us is usually a bar,) we decided to sign up for a brewer's yeast class at the Brooklyn Kitchen. Ever since our knife skills class, Heather has had her ear to the ground for new and interesting classes. (Since that class they have been expanding. When we took our first class the instruction happened at a crowded counter toward the back of the store, which was slightly nerve wracking as we were all using sharp objects within inches of each other. Now they have opened a completely separate space a few blocks from the original store on Frost Street, complete with two full teaching spaces and a high end butcher shop. They have also included retail sales at the new location, mostly of consumable goods but some kitchen equipment too. The bulk of their kitchen tools still remain at the old space on Lorimer Street.) The instructor was a guy named Chris who works as a brewer at the Brooklyn Brewery.

The class was close to three hours long, but I found it pretty helpful. Even if I'm hearing a lot of the things that I've already read about in my beer book, it's good to hear it from an actual human being. It give me reassurance that people actually do these things. Much of the class was practical advice about the role of yeast in brewing, specifically home brewing--the history, the science behind fermentation, the differences between strains, the flavors it can add or subtract from the beer, the ideal conditions for yeast to remain healthy, and so on. Some of the specific subject matter was a little over my head but much of the class was made up of neophytes like me, so many of the questions were ones that I had too.

A fringe benefit for taking this class was the tastings. In order to illustrate a point about a flavor or a style of beer, we were given small glasses of a beer that demonstrated that quality. For example, to show the difference between a lager and an ale, we were given Brooklyn Pennant Ale and Brooklyn Pilsner. He also gave us tastes of some of Brooklyn's premium beers called Local 1 and Local 2. Earlier that day, he took some of each from the tank at the brewery and allowed us to try those against the finished product of each. These particular styles are fermented in the bottle with a different yeast than it's first fermentation. This illustrated the significance of secondary fermentation. We also tried a hefeweizen and a beer called "The Wild One" made with a strain of wild yeast called brettanomyces. He mentioned before we tried it that it had kind of a hay, barnyard, horse blankety kind of flavor. It was hard not to notice it after he said it. It was interesting and kind of good, but was not my favorite. My favorite--for the record--is the Local 2.

Midway through the class we took a five minute break to wander around and go to the bathroom. Before we started again, Heather asked about a bacon flavored beer that Brooklyn Brewery put out. An impish smile crept across his face as if to say, "Yes, we did that." He briefly outlined the process of doing that, adding, "It was pretty good, but you wouldn't want to drink a lot of it."

Towards the end of the class, Chris showed us how to calculate the viable yeast cell count by looking at a sample under a microscope. Now I can delude myself into thinking that I will put the effort into many things, but I can't imagine ever caring enough to actually do this. I suppose in a yeast class we're bound to get around to cell division and such. I peeked over at Heather's note but all she had were doodles of lightning bolts and smiley faces.

After the class, our instructor stuck around to answer questions. I stuck around to hear some responses and then joined Heather in the store. The Brooklyn Kitchen sells a fairly large amount of brewing supplies and ingredients. They have an entire corner dedicated to home brewing along with a big ass fridge at the other end of the store filled with yeast and hops. The beer bottles they sold caught my eye. They have the standard 12 and 22 oz. sizes along with the swing top or grolsch style bottles but they also sold these tops with little metal straps to convert a regular bottle into a swing top. I bought one and attached it to a used champagne bottle I've been saving and it fit like gangbusters.

Heather and I caught Chris before he left and I told him I was brewing an IPA. He thought that was a good beer to start with and told me to e-mail him and let him know how it turns out. (The people at Brooklyn Kitchen all have a great friendly vibe, they know a lot about food and drink and are excited to discuss it with like minded people. It certainly keeps us coming back.) To make the night complete, we topped the experience off with a pint at Barcade. We never miss an opportunity to take advantage of all Williamsburg has to offer--at least when it comes to beer and video games.

Good Luck to the Barley Mow

For those who don't know already, Heather was nice enough to get me a beer brewing kit for Christmas. I'm not sure I needed another obsession, but I'm happy to roll with it. My gift was the kit, a box of ingredients for an IPA (India Pale Ale) and an accompanying book, How to Brew by John J. Palmer. I would recommend this book to anyone starting out because it is very well laid out. If you just want to know the basics, the first chapter will probably get you through. If you want to get more in depth about any one topic, the chapters are very clearly labeled. And if you want to get into the science of fermentation and beer production, there is no shortage of that either.

Rather than rush into brewing right after Christmas, I decided it might be best to read up a little about what I'm doing and try to avoid any pitfalls. After all if I make a mistake, I might not know right away. It might take me a solid month to find out. "Oh right, I was supposed to put yeast in it. I was wondering what that was for." I didn't read the book cover to cover, but I amassed what I thought was enough knowledge to proceed. I got all giddy and set aside a whole day to brew. In the days leading up to brew day I wouldn't shut up about it. I would point to my ingredients and say, "There it is Heather. That pile of crap will soon be delicious beer."

Heather, upon seeing my excitement, tried to temper it by warning me not to get my hopes too high. She said that she bought the ingredients as a test batch and that I shouldn't be crushed if it doesn't work out. I'll be bummed but I won't be crushed. I just can't help getting excited about it. I even talk about it at work. "Three days til brew day...Two days til brew day...brew day's tomorrow." A coworker of mine says that Heather has given me a golden ticket to become an alcoholic. Maybe, but I don't think so. There are cheaper and easier ways to get beer. Buying Pabst Blue Ribbon for one. Malt extract isn't cheap.

Then the day came--this past Thursday to be specific. The whole process is supposed to take only a couple of hours but I took things slow to make sure I was doing them right. I started by putting a gallon and a half of water on the stove in a five gallon stock pot. Before the water boils, a pound of cracked grains is steeped in the water for a half hour to give it color and aroma. To be honest, it made the entire apartment smell remarkably like Grape Nuts. After the grains are steeped, they are removed and the water is brought to a boil.

The water is then taken off the heat and half of the seven pounds of malt extract are thrown into the pot and dissolved. The pot is then put back on the heat and the first of a battery of hops are added--bittering, flavoring, and finishing. As time goes on and I get better at this whole process I'm sure I'll come to understand better this whole process, but for now I'm just doing what the directions tell me. After the bittering hops have steeped for 40 minutes, the pot is taken off the heat again and the rest of the malt extract is added.

This is where I hit a little snag. It took me a long time to dissolve the malt extract and even after ten minutes there were still little clumps. I ran the wort through a strainer and got rid of the clumps. I don't think I removed enough to harm anything, but if my beer isn't as malty as I'd like, I'll know why.

After finishing my hop additions, I transferred the pot to my sink which was waiting with ice water. I thought two bags of ice from the grocery store would be more than enough but it melts very quickly. I had just enough to get me through. After it cooled, I poured the wort through a strainer into the fermenting bucket which had two gallons of water waiting in it. The book told me that I should have a fair amount of sediment at the bottom of the pot--proteins that solidify and need not go in the fermenter--but I saw none. That may have been because I already strained it when it was on the stove. I have no idea.

After pouring the wort into the fermenter, I topped it off with additional water to achieve five gallons and sloshed it back and forth between the two containers a couple of times. The book recommends that you oxygenate the beer before you pitch the yeast. My yeast came in a little packet that resembled a cold compress. A couple of hours before brewing, you smack the bag inside the pack to activate it. The packet expands to let you know the yeast is viable. After the yeast is pitched, it's off to the races. I just have to let it sit in the dark at a constant temperature. It's currently in my office, sitting under my desk inside the box it came in. Every now and again, I'll peek in like a child to see if the airlock is moving. Like many of my projects, the main goal is to keep things from exploding and making a mess of our apartment. So far, so good.

Tomorrow marks the one week anniversary of brewing day. My goal is to obtain 50 empty beer bottles before I get to the next step in this process. I don't have that much further to go thanks to a friend of mine inviting Heather and me to a party for the Eagles/Cowboys game. The Eagles lost but I got a bunch of bottles so I count it as a win. Once I've passed two weeks, I can begin to bottle. Hopefully nothing goes wrong in that time. Wish me luck.

2009 Wrap-Up

This week's blog is designed as a little grab-bag of minutia: A few thoughts that may not have enough content for a full post, but are still worth sharing.

When Heather and I exchanged Christmas presents this year, we discovered that each of our main event presents were suited to the over 21 crowd. I had purchased Heather a one-year membership to the New York Times wine club. Heather and I both love wine and because the wine club is run by the New York Times, we can be sure that each bottle will be erudite and elitist--just our style. Every two months she will be mailed a new bottle with food pairing suggestions and a corresponding review from the Times' dining section.

Heather got me a beer brewing kit! I'm sure I'll be blogging about that in more detail later, but suffice it to say, I'm very excited about it. She even got me ingredients to make an IPA and a book that helps me make sense of this whole process. Heather may regret her decision soon when she walks into a apartment filled with boiling wort and asks, "What smells in here?" and I respond, "That's the sweet scent of malted barley and hops. Get used to it." Hopefully I do it right and the fermenter bucket doesn't explode in our study and cover all our books in yeast. This marriage probably won't last long.

Speaking of my marriage partner, Heather poked me emphatically when she saw an article a couple of days ago in the New York Times singing the praises of Benedictine. I love to discover things before they become a craze so when I read the article, I smugly assumed that it was because they read my blog post about it. Let me tell you folks, self delusion is a real ego boost.

We used the holiday season as a weak excuse to replenish our somewhat depleted alcohol supply--Bourbon, Rye, Cognac, Vodka, Frangelico--as well as a few new things like Lillet and Peychaud's Bitters. This month our credit card bill included four bars, three liquor stores, two wine shops and a partridge in a pear tree. Admittedly the partridge was a frivolous purchase, but he has been great company so far. With all of the time consuming hectic-ness (if it's not a word, it should be) of the wedding and Christmas, we are determined to use our January to live as hermits. We will leave the apartment only to keep our jobs and forage for food. The liquor purchases serve that goal.

Hopefully our anti-social behavior for the month of January will give us some time to try new things in mixing and cooking, fail at those things and blog about them in a humorous manner. And in the end, isn't that what blogging is all about?

Porterhouse

Welcome to the Ireland Series Part 3. At the end of part 2, our heros were leaving the Old Jameson Distillery and once again heading out into the rainy streets of Dublin.

In an attempt to drink beer in Ireland that wasn't Guinness (a strange concept, I know,) Heather and I found a place in the Temple bar area called The Porterhouse. This is a microbrewery with a few locations throughout Dublin. I'm a huge fan of microbrews. I like when beer making is treated with care--like an art rather than an industry. So a couple of blocks and over the Grattan Bridge we went, certificates in tow. (I'm sure local bars in Dublin are very impressed with certificates tourists like us get from Guinness and Jameson.) We take a look at the menu and decide that there are things on the menu we can both eat, so we go inside and get a table.

Looking back, I should have asked if they offered a sampler or flight of beers, but it didn't occur to me. I had a pint of the Wrasslers Stout while Heather went with a glass of the Plain Porter. One of the reasons Heather liked Ireland is that they offer beer in a glass--or half pint size. I suppose there are some place in the U.S. that will do that for you but not without a weird look. My Wrasslers was good. Distinct from Guinness insofar as it was hoppier and a tad less malty. It had more in common with the Guinness Foreign Extra that we brought home.

For our next round, I got the exact same thing. I figured I had hit upon a good thing so why change it. Also I was too drunk to form words so all I could do was gesture for another (kidding, mom.) Heather decided to switch it up and get a glass of the Temple Brau. It was clean and a tad on the bitter side. Exactly what you would expect from a German sounding beer.

The drinks paired well with our food. I got a burger and Heather got and Irish stew. I'd comment more on the food but that's really more Heather's department. Some of the staff had t-shirts that said something to the effect of "Food Runner: Don't Ask Me For Anything." I wish I could get away with something like that for my restaurant--a shirt that basically says, "Leave Me Alone."

When we left that night, we were a little alcohol soaked from the sampling we did at Guinness and Jameson plus the couple of rounds we had at Porterhouse. So we stumbled wearily onto the bus that took us home and then stumbled wearily into our hotel room. Thus ended our epic day in which we experienced the mighty triumvirate of Dublin-specific alcohol.

The following day, we met up with our friend Colleen who's in the middle of a graduate program near Dublin. When none of us could decide where to eat, we suggested we go back to Porterhouse. Good beer at reasonable prices. Colleen said she'd never been there before but then she recognized it once we got inside. "Oh yeah, I love this place!" Can Heather pick 'em or what? Heather loves going to cities and finding the insider stuff. In New York she's better then the Not For Tourists guide. She was quite proud of this Dublin find.

This time I got the Brainblasta Ale and Heather and Colleen both got pint bottles of Bulmers Pear Cider. Colleen filled us in on some controversy surrounding Bulmers Pear Cider. Apparently the original recipe contained certain laxative properties that caused people to shy away from it. Colleen assured us that the matter was addressed and that the new formula would not cause that reaction. Perhaps they should keep the old recipe in stores and market it as a laxative. "Bulmers Pear Cider: Provides Essential Roughage" or, "Bulmers Pear Cider: Better Than Metamucil!" It's a goldmine, but I digress.

The Brainblasta was very hoppy and floral--not unlike an IPA. At a lofty 7% alcohol by volume, the tag line on the website is, "Use it. Don't abuse it." The Bulmers was sweet and fruity but not my cup of tea. I prefer a standard cider. It was on this occasion that I had my first order of fish and chips. I thought it would make for nice pub fare to go with my beer and I was right. I suppose anything battered and fried pairs really well with beer. Who knew? Overall, this bar was a great way to end the alcohol themed day of our trip and when we decide to come back to Dublin, we definitely plan to return.

Guinness is Good for You

Top a' tha marnin' toe ya. Heather and I just recently got back from Ireland as many of you know and we had a fantastic time. One of the Highlights of our trip was visiting the Guinness storehouse. Don't get me wrong. Heather and I know how touristy a thing this is to do, but if we didn't go it would be like going to India and not seeing the Taj Mahal. (Side note: The Irish might consider the storehouse a thing of equal beauty and spiritual significance.) We trekked through the rain and wind to the west side of the city center to get there and we arrived just in time to grab a departing tour. Or should I say intro to a tour because the tour is self guided.

The first two things they tell you are equally ridiculous. They start by showing you a copy of the lease that Arthur Guinness signed to build the brewery at St. James's Gate. The lease is for nine thousand years. This was in 1759. This is the eighteenth century equivalent of saying elevendy billion years or perhaps saying forever and ever and ever. The second thing they tell you is that the interior of the storehouse is built in the shape of a giant pint glass. He then goes on to tell us how many pints of Guinness it would take to fill a pint glass that size. I don't remember the number because I didn't care. It's not like they would do it. That would be foolish--entertaining but foolish. Hearing that made be think that perhaps the Irish think in those terms on a daily basis. If an Irishman were to see the Grand Canyon, do you suppose his first thought would be "I wonder how many pints of Guinness..."

The ground floor gives you a rundown of the ingredients used to make beer and how Guinness's ingredients are better than everyone else's. It then goes on to say that the fifth ingredient is the founder himself, Arthur Guinness. I'm not sure whether they're saying that his interminable spirit brought the company to fruition, or if they're saying that his ashes were scattered amongst the ingredients thereby making him the fifth ingredient. You know, like a soylent green situation. Also, because the brewery was founded shortly before the American revolution, the portraiture of Arthur Guinness makes him look like a founding father or something. It might be that in Ireland, brewing a decent beer is as important as founding a nation. Then moving upward there are little videos and displays showing you how Guinness is made. There's even a little tray of roasted barley to taste. Eating roasted barley is a lot like eating coffee grounds--interesting until about two second into chewing. Then you just have to deal with it until swallowing.

There are lots of little videos about how Guinness was transported through the years. The tone of the videos makes the mission seem so noble--like this is God's work. Don't get me wrong, I love Guinness, but I don't think the motives were entirely altruistic. The highlight of the floor is the tasting lab where we both got a free taste of Guinness. A little something to tide us over until our free pint at the top.

The next floor is a tribute to advertising throughout Guinness's history. Man is there a lot of it. Much of it includes dubious health claims like "Guinness is good for you" or "Guinness makes you strong" spoken by virile men with handlebar mustaches. They even pulled a publicity stunt at one point in which thousands of bottles were dropped into the ocean each containing a message from king Neptune telling you to drink Guinness. Apparently they are still being found today. I will say that these ads, despite being false and environmentally unfriendly, were effective because I really wanted my Guinness. We blew through the next few floors because they didn't have as much stuff on them.

We got to the penultimate floor and it's perfect pint display. This is where they have a bunch of taps set up and you get to try your hand at pouring the perfect pint. You have the option of either getting your free pint this way or going upstairs to the gravity bar and having them pour it. Heather didn't want to be put on the spot--also she's lazy--but I'm all in. I waited patiently in line until it was my turn where I was instructed to start pouring with the glass at a 45 degree angle, straighten it out and stop at mid-harp (the Guinness glasses have a harp logo near the top.) Then I was told to wait two minutes and then fill up the rest by pushing back on the tap (rather than towards me) to top it off with only Guinness and no nitrogen. Very scientific stuff, I won't bore you. My performance was good enough to earn me an honorary certificate.

I had my pint; the only thing left to do was get Heather hers. We headed up to the gravity bar, got her pint and sat down. The bar has a 360 degree view of Dublin. It would be a really cool place to hang out again if we didn't have to pay eleven euros (student rate--because we're liars) to get in. The view was rainy but pleasant and a great way to enjoy our well earned stouts.

Before we left we hit the gift shop where I got my dad chocolate in the shape of a Guinness pint and we got ourselves two bottles of Guinness Foreign Extra--one of their original recipes with extra hops designed for foreign travel. I've never had it before and I didn't know if they sell it in the U.S. We only got around to trying it two nights ago and it was pretty good. It was nice and hoppy and not as thick while still maintaining its Guinness-ness. I think I like the draught better but sometimes it's nice to live life on the edge. I'm glad we went to the storehouse. It gave us something fun, interesting and uniquely Irish to do on a crappy day--which there are a lot of. I would recommend it highly.

Citi-Field

It's World Series time again and it's Phillies vs. Yankees. I have no intention of going to a World Series game because I don't have hundreds upon hundreds of dollars to spend on a ticket, but all the focus on baseball lately has me remembering some of my recent major league experiences. I've been to Citi Field twice this past season. The first time was a Mets vs. Phillies game. These two teams have something of a rivalry and the place was packed.

Heather and I went as part of a group of five. She really wanted to go because of all the articles she had read about the food being great. Deep down, I don't think she cared about the game nearly as much as the dining. I guess I shouldn't really care as long as it gets her excited about going to a ball park. We got in and immediately made a b-line for the food. Behind the center field wall is a huge courtyard with all sorts of food options, the most popular of which being Shake Shack. I stood in a really long line to get a burger while Heather went to Blue Smoke to get some wings. At the center of it all is a giant beer stand called Big Apple Brews with staff at every side.

Let me say that for a ball park, I was supremely impressed with the beer selection. Heather wanted a stout but unfortunately they had none, so the guy working there suggested the Beck's Dark while I got the Goose Island IPA. The beer was very good and a little incongruous with the plastic cup I was drinking it out of. The guy pouring my beer in this picture was super nice, gave me no guff for sporting Phillies apparel and specifically angled the pouring of my beer to improve the picture. Mad props to the staff at Citi Field and specifically Big Apple Brews.

It was a good night: Good game, good friends, good beer. I don't know which was better, the fact that the Phillies won or seeing a guy in a Mets shirt who was yelling like a jackass get ejected from the park for throwing a fistful of peanut shells at another guy for asking him to keep it down. Incidentally, the man who got hit with shells was also wearing a Mets shirt. It wasn't a hometown pride thing, he was just being a douche.

The second time I went was with my dad to a Mets vs. Cardinals game. It was an afternoon game so it had more of a relaxed feel. We didn't do a whole lot of walking around because we had decent seats, but I did notice something that I hadn't before. At one of the concession stands, there were two beer taps; one of them was Bud Light and one of them was Stella Artois. In my mind, this alone was a giant leap from the stadiums of old. Sure you can go to the ballpark and kick back with a nice cold Bud. You would be alienating your entire core audience if you didn't provide some sort of light beer like Bud, Miller, or Coors. However I think it is great that if a guy like me--who loves a ball game but prefers a Stella to a Bud--pays for a ticket to see the Amazin' Mets, he never has to be more that thirty feet from a beer that suits him.

The new Mets stadium seems to be about inclusion and making sure there's a little something for everybody. There's some decent food for Heather, there's a wide variety of beer for me, there's Budweiser and hot dogs for my Dad. And if we're lucky, there's a decent ballgame to watch. I guess it's fitting that a place like Citi Field exists in a place like New York where people of different cultures with different tastes can coexist.

Barcade Hero

We were in Williamsburg recently (Brooklyn, that is, not Virginia) taking a knife skills class and we thought it would be a great opportunity to try out a bar that we've heard a lot about--Barcade. The gimmick with this place is that they boast a full bar and a bunch of 80's style stand-up video games.

I suppose, in my own mind, I was preparing myself for disappointment. Sure I really enjoy playing video games, but if a bar has video games, it's usually one or two and they're usually tucked in some ignored corner. I pictured a combination pac-man/galaga machine where the start button doesn't work and a centipede game with no rollerball. Maybe there would be a claw machine too but that would be it. This was what I was bracing myself for.

We walked into the place and I was wrong. The walls were lined with games. We counted over thirty of them. No claw machines, no photo booth that puts your face on a sticker, no fodder. Just classic stand-up arcade games. I remember thinking that a pinball machine or two would have been fun and Heather said she would have appreciated some skee-ball, but I have to believe that the proprietors of this establishment are purists and I respect that. I like that they've decided to do one thing and do it really well. I sauntered up to the bar to select my beverage. I had an Oktoberfest and Heather had the Doc's Cider.

I looked around to survey the scene. It was a Wednesday night so it wasn't crowded at all and it seemed like everyone there was a regular. To them, I suppose, the games had lost their luster. Heather and I had our pick of the litter. There was a change machine next to the bar that I stuck a five in. Twenty quarters--twenty chances to be somebody.

As I approached the games--beer in one hand, quarters in the other--I wondered what I was going to do with my beer while I played. Was I going to have to set it on a table and have Heather watch it while I'm having fun. The good people at Barcade thought of that. Next to each game is a shelf where you can set your beer while you play. It may seem like a little thing but I was impressed. It showed that they put some thought into the setup of the place.

The games were a quarter a piece. The same price they were when they were manufactured. They weren't retrofitted with higher prices and it's a good thing too because I am not as good at classic video games as I originally thought. I had to burn through a quarter or two just to get the hang of them. The first one I tried was Contra. It took me three quarters just to get past the first jungle area. Three. I moved on to Frogger, Tetris, Donkey Kong, and even some lesser known games like 1941, Pengo, and Ladybug. I had considered playing Q-bert but then I remembered how bad I was at Q-bert and reconsidered. We looked at the high scores board that was posted and saw that there was a Star Wars game. We looked around for it because it seemed cool, but it was broken in an alcove near the bathroom.

I dont know that I've ever been cool in my life. I was in the chess club in middle school and I was a drama nerd in high school. Video games are just cool. Anyone who's seen the underrated Fred Savage movie The Wizard knows that.

It makes sense that a place like this exists in a place like Williamsburg, Brooklyn. Barcade knows exactly the audience to which they're catering. White, mid-twenties, with a little bit of disposable income. Someone who is a lot like me. If this place were in Jackson Heights, I'd be there every night and they would have to force me out with me screaming that I can't leave before I get the high score in Marble Madness. However Barcade has a very specific demographic. If you were to open it in, say, the Pennsylvania suburbs where I grew up, you would alienate a large segment of the drinking population. Sure you've got places like Dave and Buster's, but they've got a lot of unnecessary bells and whistles and the games cost a lot more. Barcade has a much more subdued classic arcade feel.

There's something about being an adult and playing video games that's even better than doing it as a kid. While I was playing Donkey Kong, I was thinking that life doesn't get better than this. I'm playing an awesome video game with a decent beer at my side while a hot chick--namely my lovely fiance Heather--looks over my shoulder and cheers me on. If there's anything better than that in life, I don't want to know about it.

Beer Garden

Last week, Heather and I went to Studio Square for the second time. Studio square is a huge beer garden in Long Island City with indoor and outdoor seating, a large contingent of German and Domestic beers, and an area where you can get food like sausages, burgers and sushi. The first time we went was a little crowded because it was on a Friday so this was the first time that we got to spread out and enjoy ourselves. On our first visit to this beer garden it seemed like there were lots of good places to sit, but when we would go to sit down, someone would inform us that the seats were taken. Damn it! High school all over again. Rather than assert ourselves and sit down anyway, (at one point there was a man saving an entire picnic table) we decided to piss, moan and write a scathing blog about it. Take that, guy in backwards mets cap who will never read this blog. Revenge tastes pretty sweet.

We did finally find a place to drink our beer. They have this area that’s about as high as a bar but there’s a fire pit in the center. This was really cool at times but I thought that if the wrong gust of wind came by, I would lose my eyebrows. We only stayed for one round so my eyebrows stayed intact. This past trip was much better. Heather and I are more of a low key weeknight crowd. We easily got a burger, sausage, beer, sangria and table.

The beer at Studio Square comes in unique measurements. They have pitchers—which are not that unusual—but they also serve beer by the liter and half liter. I found this strange because we don’t really use the metric system in the United States. I would say that beer by the liter would go over big in England, but do you know how they measure beer over there? By the pint. I hope the irony is not lost on the good people at Studio Square. I ordered a liter of Racer 5 IPA and man was this thing huge. It was served in a cartoonish large glass that puts a 22-ouncer from Fridays to shame. It costs thirteen dollars, but it’s a buck cheaper than getting two half liters. Heather said I looked ridiculous holding this mammoth beer but I didn’t care. I have so few pleasures in life. I wish it were socially acceptable to carry a liter of beer everywhere I go. I know that’s a thing that alcoholics say but hear me out. I don’t want to drink massive amounts of beer all day. I just want to have it as a crazy prop.

We’ve only been to one other beer garden in New York called Bohemian Hall & Beer Garden. This was not a great experience for us. There was a distinct lack of organization in this place. It took us a really long time to even get a beer because the line was so long. (Thank God there was a line at all.) We really wanted to get food too but the only way to get food was to get a table and have waiter service. We talked to a waitress and she said that there was a big table about to leave, but what she meant was that they were going to pay and stay for a really long time. There was no way we were getting a table. Why can’t we just line up somewhere and get the food. There seemed to be a window that was fully capable of dispensing food. In my opinion, the sign of a bad business is when the customer has a pocketful of money he’s willing to throw at an establishment and can’t for one reason or another. Heather e-mailed the place to complain and got no response so to hell with them I say. I’d rather go to Studio Square and not switch trains.